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Forty-seven-year-old native of Ikaram, Akoko in Akoko Northwest Ondo State, Makinde Falowo, speaks to TEMITOPE ADETUNJI about the impact of losing his mother at a young age, his challenges since suffering a hearing loss at 20, and how he continues to navigate life in a world that often doesn’t understand his struggles
What was your childhood and upbringing like?
I’m a native of Akoko North-West in Ondo State, I’m from Ikaram Akoko. Growing up was fun and challenging because I grew up without my mother. My mother passed away in 1984 when I was just a seven-year-old boy. Her absence created a void, but I was raised by my paternal grandmother and an aunt we lovingly called ‘Mummy’. They stepped in to fill the gap, nurturing me with care and love.
You only talked about losing your mum. What about your dad?
My dad passed away in 2023.
What was the cause of your hearing loss?
The events leading to my hearing loss began on the evening of March 23, 1998. I had just returned home after leaving school when I started feeling unwell. A sudden headache hit me, followed by feverish symptoms. By the next day, I was so weak that I couldn’t even stand up, let alone prepare to go back to school. That was the end of my pursuit of education, I was in 200-Level.
That day marked the last time I ever set foot on my school campus. It felt as though death had come for me. I was that gravely ill. Through medical intervention, I was revived. Drips and numerous injections kept me alive, but the ordeal left me with profound changes, including the loss of my hearing. I couldn’t hear anymore.
What course did you study, and what school?
I majored in English; English and Social Studies. The school’s name is Federal College of Education, Kano. It was supposed to be a stepping stone for my dream career as a diplomat.
How old were you when you lost your hearing ability?
In 1998, I was 20 years and a few months old.
How old are you now?
I was born on August 29, 1977.
How did your family and friends react to your hearing loss?
My family and friends were utterly devastated. Tears flowed endlessly as they struggled to process my predicament and sympathised with what I was going through. When my condition became critical, I was moved from Kano to Abuja for further treatment.
Initially, I was taken to Gwagwalada Hospital, which was considered the top hospital in Abuja at the time—or at least, that was what I believed. After spending some time there and undergoing consultations, we were directed to Garki General Hospital. I continued with treatments at Garki for a while before being referred to the newly opened National Hospital. Back then, National Hospital had just started its medical operations, and it was seen as a significant step forward in healthcare.
Eventually, in 2014, I was referred to Super Specialty Hospital in Karu, Abuja. This hospital, established by Indian medical professionals, was where I finally received a definitive diagnosis. It was there that I was told I would need Cochlear Implant Surgery to regain any ability to hear. The damage to my ears was so severe—essentially non-existent—that hearing aids were not an option. I already knew something was wrong because of the constant, horrible buzzing sound in my head and ears. It’s not just irritating; it’s nauseating and deeply traumatising.
As for acceptance, it was a difficult journey. I was so sick and frail at the time that I hardly interacted with anyone. The combination of my health challenges and the overwhelming sense of isolation made it hard for me to even think about how others perceived my condition.
Why didn’t you do the cochlear implants?
The cochlear implants are a multimillion-naira procedure. At the time, in 2014, the category required for me would cost N6m—N3m for each ear. There are four categories of the implant, but the severity of my impairment required that I undergo category four, the costliest of all.
Do you have siblings?
We are four boys that our parents had before my mother’s demise in 1984. I’m the third.
Did you go through a phase of denial or depression after losing your hearing?
Losing my hearing was an immense shock. It happened within days after I fell ill, and the experience instantly turned my world upside down. I became a recluse, unable to move around much because I couldn’t walk properly. The excruciating pain in my head and ears made everything even more unbearable. It took a long, emotionally taxing, and difficult journey for me to adapt and come to terms with the fact that I had become deaf.
What were the most significant challenges you faced immediately after losing your hearing?
As I mentioned earlier, I withdrew from the world. I stopped socialising and interacting with people, and to a large extent, that remains true even now. Another major challenge was my inability to walk properly. It wasn’t just temporary—I still struggle with walking, especially at night. My movements are shaky and clumsy, and I’ve been told it’s related to my central nervous system and the brain.
I found myself in a completely different and strange world, far removed from what I used to know. This new reality was, and still is, traumatising and profoundly disheartening. It feels as though I exist in a world of my own, isolated and unfamiliar.
How did you learn sign language, or what other methods of communication have you adopted?
I didn’t learn sign language, although I’ve always been fascinated by it. Instead, I rely on other methods to understand and communicate. One way is by closely observing people’s lip movements, trying to deduce what they’re saying. However, this doesn’t always work well, and it can be frustrating for both sides.
As a result, I often ask people to write down what they want to say. Written communication is much clearer for me and ensures I understand the message. That said, it’s not a perfect solution. Writing everything down can be tedious and demanding, especially for the person trying to communicate with me. But for now, it’s the most effective method I have.
Did losing your hearing make you more observant or sensitive to other aspects of life?
Yes, losing my hearing made me extremely observant and sensitive to situations and the world around me. Over time, my sixth sense developed into a guiding force, giving me insights that helped me navigate life. My intuition became sharper, allowing me to decipher things and understand people’s intentions with remarkable accuracy. It’s as if this heightened sense compensates for what I lack, and it has proved to work perfectly for me in many situations.
Can you share an experience where you felt completely misunderstood because of your hearing disability?
There are countless instances. I struggle with interacting and socialising, especially in large gatherings. When people celebrate or engage in merriment, I find it difficult to mingle. This often leads others to label me as snobbish or arrogant. They don’t realise that my reality and the way I perceive life are different from theirs.
Another frequent misunderstanding happens when people speak to me, sometimes just to greet me, and I fail to respond because I don’t hear them. Naturally, they feel offended, interpreting my silence as intentional or rude, when in truth, it’s neither of both. It’s simply a result of my hearing impairment. These moments can be painful because they reflect how much people don’t understand the challenges I face.
What kind of work do you do as a hearing-impaired person?
Making a living has been a significant challenge, primarily because of the severity of my hearing loss. I’ve tried my hand at various ventures to support myself, but many of them haven’t worked out as planned. I’ve been fortunate to have friends, family, and close-knit companions who have been my support pillars. They are my rock, always there for me, and assisting me. Without their unwavering help, surviving and meeting my basic needs would have been far more difficult.
It’s been a tough journey trying to make a living for myself. I’ve tried my hand at various jobs and ventures, but they don’t always work out as planned. In many ways, I owe my survival to friends, family, and loved ones. My friends, in particular, have been my solid rock.
Have you ever faced discrimination or missed opportunities because of your hearing loss?
I can’t pinpoint specific instances of outright discrimination, but it’s evident that I’ve missed out on many opportunities. It’s a natural consequence of my condition. Being in a unique situation like mine, it’s hard to compete with able-bodied individuals who don’t face the same barriers. Opportunities often favour those without such challenges, and that’s simply the reality I’ve had to accept.
Through it all, I try to focus on what I can do and lean on the support of those who understand my journey. While it isn’t always easy, it has taught me resilience and the importance of surrounding myself with people who truly care.
Then how has life been for you?
Life is extremely tough for me. I’m just managing myself. God’s grace, goodness, and the benevolence of my kith and kin have kept me going. I aspire to become a techie, but it hasn’t been easy keeping up with reading or following instructional videos. However, I’m determined to pursue it once I find the calm and focus to study effectively.
Have you tried applying for jobs?
I tried in the past, but it just isn’t possible for someone with a peculiar problem like mine to be employed by most people.
What kind of help do you need?
As humans always say, ‘Money answers everything’. This is the primary help I really need. I’ll appreciate whatever help anyone can render to me.
English (US) ·